Holiday Filksonglets!
by Sharyna
Summary: The Boss roots her MSTers out of vay-cay break to carol!


Holiday Filksonglets  
by Sharyna Tran  
=====  
Disclaimer: All songs used are not property of the author, although   
the characters and adaptations are. Steal any of either, and you're   
looking at a slow barefoot walk over hot coals and exploration   
of your internal organs while you watch. Et cetera.  
=====  
  
[Anita, Silf, and Andromeda walk into the MSTing conference   
room, where Deception and Shrike are already waiting for them.]  
  
Anita *sniffling*: What's up?   
Silf: Yeah, what's so important that it couldn't wait until   
tomorrow? I don't get many days off...  
Andromeda: And will it take long? My current experiment needs   
a lot of attention at the moment, I can't pause the works for that long...  
Deception: Oh, come on now. You guys haven't been working   
for the Boss that long, and you're already starting to whine.  
Shrike: Yeah, wait'll you start branching off into other   
departments, *then* you'll have something to whine about. As   
Jian can testify to, if you ever meet him. @_@ Dear godlings,   
she's got him *everywhere*.  
Deception: No kidding. LJ, MLs, TALs...poor guy. *shakes her   
head* Anyways, this time it's nothing big. She just decided that   
we should be singing a few carols, for the Christmas season.  
Silf: Thought she didn't celebrate Christmas?  
Shrike: Oh, she doesn't. I dunno why she's doing this. No-one   
knows much about why the Boss does anything. Anyways...  
*hands out a bunch of cheap carol-books and cheesy Santa hats*   
Here you guys go. Oh, and she's tweaked them in her own little   
way, so beware.  
Anita *sniffling again*: Uhm...I've kinda got a cold...do I still   
have to do this?  
Deception: Sorry, yeah. But don't worry. It's not like you're   
going to be singing alone or anything. Let's get started, shall we?  
  
[Everyone opens their carol-books and begins singing the first song.]  
  
(Song 1: Filk of "Last Christmas...")  
  
Last Christmas, I gave you my pop-tart,  
But it was old and stale, and you threw it away  
This year, to save me from tears  
I'll give you a pumpkin, special...  
  
[Everyone gradually stops.]  
  
Anita: OK. This cold I've got is *not* the only reason this   
seems totally incoherent to me, is it?  
Others: *shake their heads*  
Shrike: Well, the Boss seems to have gone full-bore looney this   
year.  
Deception *shrugs*: We might as well see how messed up the   
other songs are...  
  
[Everyone opens up their carol-books again.]  
  
(Song 2: Filk of "We Wish You a Merry Christmas")  
  
We wish you a merry Fishmas,  
We wish you a merry Fishmas,   
We wish you a merry Fishmas,   
And a happy new beer!  
  
Good salmon to all,   
Wherever you are,  
Good salmon for Fishmas,  
And a happy new beer!   
  
Silf: Well, that wasn't SO bad. It at least made a LITTLE sense,   
I think.  
Andromeda: Should we go on?  
Shrike: Might as well, there's only one song left.  
  
(Song 3: Filk of "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus")  
  
I saw chickens eating Santa Claus,  
Underneath the Christmas tree last night  
They didn't see me creep  
Down the stairs to have a peep;  
They wanted his milk and cookies,   
and they didn't want to share  
So  
They just started eating Santa Claus  
Underneath the Christmas tree, that's right  
Oh,   
The money I could make  
If only I'd thought to tape  
Chickens eating Santa Claus last night!  
  
[Everyone closes their carol-books, eyes O_O]  
  
Deception: Well. That was...extremely freaky.  
Others: No kidding.  
Andromeda *examines her carol-book closely*: Are you sure   
that's the last song? That's it?  
Deception: Ummm...I think so...  
Shrike: Yeah, I don't think she made any more. Though I think   
she ghostwrote for one for this Jarred kid from another team, but   
that's another story. Why? Is there a problem?  
Andromeda *takes off her Santa hat and starts gesturing wildly   
with it*: There aren't any Jewish songs! I can't believe it! Doesn't   
she *know* about Hanukkah?  
Shrike: Um. I think she *knows* about it, but...um...  
Deception: That *is* weird, though. I guess she didn't have   
enough inspiration, or something?  
Anita: Well, maybe she just had too much respect for the Jewish   
faith to filk it. Or something.  
Andromeda: But...but that's not *fair*!  
Silf: Oh, come on. You don't see *me* whining about the lack   
of an Eid-al-Fitr filksong, do you?  
Deception: Thought you said you were Greek Orthodox?  
Silf: Well, yeah. But I'm half-Egyptian, so I do know of *some*   
Muslim traditions.  
Andromeda: Hmph! Well, if *she's* not going to bother to   
make a Hanukkah filksong, *I'm* just going to have to! Wait right   
here, guys. *she walks over to one of the chairs, grabs a pencil   
from behind her ear, and starts scribbling madly on the back of   
her carol-book*  
  
[The others wait around a bit, Andromeda soon comes back.]  
  
Andromeda: Right, then! *holds out her carol-book so that   
everyone can read it* OK, on three. Three!  
  
[Everyone begins singing.]  
  
(Song 4: Filk of "The Dreidle Song")  
  
I have a mega-laser,  
I made it out of...(*whispering* "What's that say?" *whisperwhisperwhisper* "Oh.") manyvariouscomponents  
And when I'm good and ready,  
The world will I take over.  
  
Oh laser, laser, laser,  
I made it out of manyvariouscomponents  
Oh laser, laser, laser,  
Now the world will I take over.  
  
It has a lovely on-switch,  
And it's so light and thin,  
And after it is fired,  
The world's mine-then I win!  
  
Oh laser, laser, laser,  
I made it out of manyvariouscomponents  
Oh laser, laser, laser,  
Now the world will I take over.  
  
Anita: Isn't there another verse?  
Andromeda: Yeah, but I couldn't make anything fit for it, so...oh   
well. *shrugs*  
Deception: All right then, I guess that about wraps it up. You're   
free to go home, guys. Happy holidays!  
Anita, Andromeda, Silf *leaving*: Happy holidays!  
  
=====  
These filksonglets were brought to you by Sharyna Tran, co-moderator of Meek-Haiygn Press, which brings you (yes, *you*) the wonderful News Letter, which includes Tempest's Advice Line, assorted quotes, and various happyshinyfluffy extras! Wai! Join today, it's free! (no, you will not receive any spam or other such stuff from us, because we're nice people :P) The address is: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Meek-HaiygnPress/join, if you'd like to join by e-mail, simply send a blank e-mail to Meek-HaiygnPress-subscribe@yahoogroups.com. Thank you, and have a nice day!  
  
=====  
Live well, eat chicken, and bye!  
  
Sharyna  
  
Co-Moderator, Meek-Haiygn Press


End file.
